weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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