I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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