That's when you crack a 10am beer
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
If its not for food we ain't going out.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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