Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
