Can Purell be used as lube?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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