Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
