What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
