Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize