Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I accidentally had phone sex last night
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
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