I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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