my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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