I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize