seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
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