Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
