I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
