You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Are my feet made of real feet?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize