everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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