so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize