Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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