I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i barfeds in our rink
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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