so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Randomize
