there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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