It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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