Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
