i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
thus making me awesome and them whores
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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