That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
