I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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