just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
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