Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
