You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize