I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
