we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
