no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Randomize
