It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
