; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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