Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
