I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
time to smoke my breakfast
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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