I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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