she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
