I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
