Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Randomize
