Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
