You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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