Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
