haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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