walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
