Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
The air taste purple.
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