Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
