please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
