I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
