I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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